Bacon cheeseburgers on green onion brioche

Last night we went to see the Department of Eagles play at the Doug Fir. I love that band so much, and it was a really great show (though they pretty much stuck to In Ear Park and mocked my cries for Forty Dollar Rug). Before the show, I didn’t really know what to make for dinner, but had a pound of ground beef (the last of the grass-fed beeve we bought last summer) and two days-old green onion sweet buns from the Vietnamese bakery. I kept forgetting to take them to work for breakfast, and boy howdy! Am I ever glad about it.

Those Vietnamese really know how to bake. They don’t, however, seem to be too fond of printing the name of their food on labels or the internet, because I have no idea what they call these buns. They’re slightly sweet and tender like brioche (or Hawaiian sweet bread), and come in a variety of flavors like sweet bean, ham and cheese, hot dog and corn (a personal favorite), or green onion. I usually go for the green onion, because I’m a slave to green onion on sweet pastry (which reminds me, I’m overdue for some dim sum).

I sliced the b├ính-something (I’m pretty sure these are actually Chinese in origin, but who knows) in half cross-wise and assembled them: first, a little mayo and mustard; then the mammoth gluttony burgers (a whopping half pound each); a slice of thick, smoky bacon; sauteed mushrooms and onions; a slab of Madrigal cheese and barbecue sauce. If they weren’t $2 each, I’da put some avocado on there too. I know the purists are giving me that look. Don’t look at me like that, this is my way of a burger. Besides, if you’re using fancy scallion buns you’ve already ruined everything. Fucking live a little.

Serve with blue box and not a shred of irony.