Gilding the Lily since 2006
I was going to call it “Spaghetti alla Bottarga con Limone e Prezzemolo” but that seemed too fussy, so I broke half of it into English. That way I can confuse the Italians and English-speakers who find me accidentally through Google. Plus I don’t know …
Lasagna always seems like such a fuss, and I’ll admit it, I usually just go for a frozen one. It always seems like too much work to make a real one, from scratch, and frozen ones aren’t that bad (if you avoid the orange grease …
Last night we went to see the Department of Eagles play at the Doug Fir. I love that band so much, and it was a really great show (though they pretty much stuck to In Ear Park and mocked my cries for Forty Dollar Rug). Before the show, I didn’t really know what to make for dinner, but had a pound of ground beef (the last of the grass-fed beeve we bought last summer) and two days-old green onion sweet buns from the Vietnamese bakery. I kept forgetting to take them to work for breakfast, and boy howdy! Am I ever glad about it.
Those Vietnamese really know how to bake. They don’t, however, seem to be too fond of printing the name of their food on labels or the internet, because I have no idea what they call these buns. They’re slightly sweet and tender like brioche (or Hawaiian sweet bread), and come in a variety of flavors like sweet bean, ham and cheese, hot dog and corn (a personal favorite), or green onion. I usually go for the green onion, because I’m a slave to green onion on sweet pastry (which reminds me, I’m overdue for some dim sum).
I sliced the bánh-something (I’m pretty sure these are actually Chinese in origin, but who knows) in half cross-wise and assembled them: first, a little mayo and mustard; then the mammoth gluttony burgers (a whopping half pound each); a slice of thick, smoky bacon; sauteed mushrooms and onions; a slab of Madrigal cheese and barbecue sauce. If they weren’t $2 each, I’da put some avocado on there too. I know the purists are giving me that look. Don’t look at me like that, this is my way of a burger. Besides, if you’re using fancy scallion buns you’ve already ruined everything. Fucking live a little.
Serve with blue box and not a shred of irony.
…or, What To Do With Leftover Shogayaki and Rice. Hey, Xin Nian Kuai Le, everybody! I really hate posting this bowl of beige and blur after all the pretty and the comfy, but it’s Chinese New Year and I’m making burritos for dinner tonight. I …
Scott and I were up so, so late last night, finishing an evening celebrating Norm‘s birthday with friends and 20-year old syrah that smelled like goat testicles (and Saxum Rocket Block (2005?) – a grenache that was like making out with black cherries and literally …
Wow, what a week. Not even a (much-needed, and well-spent) paid holiday or a sexah new president could shake the funk of cold weather and crampy ladytimes. I made it to the gym again, to try to run off some of my shitty attitude, but it just made me more tired. When push finally came to shove, dinner had to come with gravy.
You love those Ikea Swedish meatballs so much, don’t you. Of course you do, you’re not made of stone. You don’t, however, love driving through traffic to circle the 50-acre parking lot, or swimming through the crowds of mouth-breathers that hoved in from the suburbs to buy exquisite plywood shelving with sleek birch veneers. What in the fuck can you do, though? You love those meatballs.
So make them your damn self already. Mix together some ground chuck and ground pork (about 3:1, respectively, for about a pound total), an egg, a half-handful of plain bread crumbs, a quarter of an onion (minced), more nutmeg than you think you should (at least ten scratches across your microplane zester), four or five good cracks of pepper, and a few pinches of crunchy salt. Mix only until combined, and use a little ice cream scoop to perfectly portion out meatballs onto a silpat. Roast these at 400 for about 20 or 30 minutes, until they’re browned and lovely.
Whilst the meatballs are roasting, get a roux going. When it’s nutty, whisk in milk until the lumps are all gone, and it is creamy and gravylike. Add some cracks of pepper (white is nice, if you have it), salt and 10 or 15 scratches of nutmeg. After it’s bubbled for a spell (and the floury taste is gone), add some minced fresh thyme and a generous spoonful of creme frâiche, and taste. Whilst the gravy is simmering, boil some egg noodles. When they’re done, toss in a knob of butter to coat. Toss a squonch of chopped parsley at it artfully.
Serve with a mug of hefedunkel and bork bork bork.
I am so into the toasty-crouton-on-soup thing right now. It’s the reason for soup, almost, to get crispy bread and buttery, melty goodness into my gaping maw. This soup is of typical creation myth: too lazy for a trip to the store, too much good …
I just lost some of you, didn’t I. It’s just gingery pork chops and cucumber salad, nothing weird. I have noticed that I get a lot more comments on classic diner favorites and American comfort food than on the Asian food I make, but I’m …
There’s just no way to make meatloaf look pretty, is there? Too bad.
In an attempt to make room for all the pig that I just bought, I had to pull a couple things from the freezer, among them a 3-lb sirloin tip roast from the half beeve that I split with Greta and Matt last spring. Matt is always good for going in on meat en carcasse – it’s good to have coworkers and friends who give a shit about where their food comes from.
Normally, I’d never do such a thing as grind a lean cut of meat like sirloin tip roast, but I also didn’t want to wait another day to roast it on the weekend, nor did I want to slice steaks off it. And I have meat coming out of my ass right now anyway, so why not a meatloaf? It’s cold out, and gravy is the cure.
I ground the roast (and some ends of bacon for fat) on the coarsest grind, added an egg, a slice of stale wheat bread and a small onion (these went in the grinder, too), the last blob of gochujang and some squirts of Worcestershire sauce, some fresh thyme and parsley, some paprika and lot of salt and pepper. Mix gently and just enough – overworking makes a tough meatloaf. Form into a babyloaf shape and bake on a sheet in a 375-degree oven for about 45-60 minutes.
I never use a loaf pan to make meatloaf anymore because that juice will sit in there and boil the meat, which is not tasty. Also, when you try to cut a slice, it falls apart like loosemeats. The baking sheet technique is just way better, trust me on this.
I mashed some boiled white and russet potatoes with cream and butter, then folded in some grated cheddar because I am evidently trying to get a big, fat ass. I honestly don’t know why I added cheese, I was like on autopilot or someshit.
Serve with an ice cold Coke and The Office.
Since I split a half a pig with Matt, I had to pull a lot of shit out of the freezer to make room. Miraculously, my already-packed freezer could fit a quarter hog. Must be my mad Tetris skills. I always buy seafood several pieces …